Bedtime

"Please put away your tea-set, it's time for bed. Pick up the toys from the living room, and then go brush your teeth. I'll be in there in just a minute to kiss you goodnight."

What anguish has befallen the children in this home!?!
It is a painful image, but for a moment just imagine having the person who connivingly shopped for, prepared and cooked all your meals for one full day, who laundered your clothes, tickled your back as directed, requested that you join her in prayer, took you to church before she would drive you to the destinations of your choice, located your lost hairbrush, read you stories and the newspaper, organized your upcoming birthday party and forced you write some of the invitations, and then assessed a "rash" you thought you might have on an unmentionable part of your anatomy, would actually require three whole tasks from you at the end of the day? Can you conceive the nightmare of having to be concerned with whether or not you were caught putting all the sugar you could pour into a 6 oz. cup of tea, and then racing to drink the syrupy contraband before it was seized by this dictator, and then being given an unfairly stern admonishment about the dangers of such wanton excesses? Then could you possibly fathom that this same person, while demanding that you finally conclude your day and "go to bed", would follow this despair with, of all things, lovingly sweet kisses from her lips?

Oh, perish the thought that your life would ever turn so vile! The poor children in this home have so much to endure. Please pray for them.

Mrs. America's Talent Portion

I have one unique talent that could definitely earn me a spot on "Stupid People Tricks". I can make my stomach growl. Yes, you heard correctly. I can make my stomach growl at will, and on command. Betcha never thought the human body could be so finely tuned.
I wonder if I should wear a leotard when I perform my talent for the masses.

Latkes for Twenty

Oy!
I have never made latkes. Not a big surprise for a Goy, however I possess no less than a half-dozen recipes for the tasty little potato pancakes. Yet have I actually produced any? No, that is not until today. They didn't turn out too bad, and Mr. G looked for a second helping after inhaling the sample I delivered to him as he remained reclined on the couch. The true test will be tomorrow when the little starchy pads are reheated and served to 15 sweeties between the ages of 5 and 8, including participating co-op moms. Wish me luck. Mazeltov!

I really don't have time for this...

Praise Jesus, and Welcome! I'm sure I have something to say. I guess I'll say it later. I've spent way too long on this idea as it is, so the rest, and best, will just have to wait! I think I need a nap...